Writing your own vows can be incredibly romantic, but could make your guests cringe if you don’t do it right! You also have to trust that your groom knows what he’s doing, which is opening a whole new can of worms. I have been to weddings where the bride and groom’s words were so beautiful and touching that they brought tears to everyone’s eyes, but there were other vows that just made me want to fast forward through the whole thing! What makes the difference, you ask? Well it wasn’t because of their writing talents. The difference was in the fact that one couple spoke from their hearts, while the others recited cheesy lines and phrases that they thought were appropriate to say.

When you are writing your own vows, it is not about giving an eloquent speech. Speak from your heart and pretend it is just the two of you in the room, with no one else present. Truly open up and tell your groom just how much you love him and how different your life has been since you met. Tell about the first time you met him, or when you first realized that you were in love as if you were telling a story to a close friend. Think of the true definition of vow; give your promise to him, the promise of your loyalty and love. If you are emotional while writing your vows, then that is when you know that you are on the right track. If you are going through a poem book or some other cliché that you know is not moving you, then it won’t move him either nor touch your guests. Your vows should be about the two of you and no one else. The words should come from deep within your heart!

Now that we covered how to write your vows, let’s discuss your beloved groom. If you don’t put too much pressure on him, and make sure to let him know that this doesn’t have to be a literary masterpiece, then he will do just fine. Assure him that it does not have to be long or like a movie scene. Tell him you just want him to tell you why he loves you and wants to spend the rest of his life with you. Now, as a precaution, involve your maid of honor in this process. Have her ask your finance if he would like to practice it with her (of course not letting him know that you set her up to this!). He will probably be relieved to have someone to give him suggestions because after all, he (hopefully!) won’t be getting input on your wedding vows from his football buddies!

By speaking with the heart and running it by your friends a few times to keep the nerves at bay, you will undoubtedly have a tear-inducing, beautiful vow that reflects just how special your love is!